The Rite Goes The Wrong Way

It's important to setup your characters. You need to establish them and generate some sympathy. Many horror films get it completely wrong(My Soul To Take, I'm looking at you, you pile of dog shit, post on that later), but some do a good job(Frailty, original Halloween). That said, you shouldn't take nearly 40 minutes to setup one character. You also shouldn't keep your marquee actor off-screen for 40 minutes. That could be considered cinematic suicide.

The Rite is apparently "inspired" by real events. In reality, it's based on a book(itself possibly more fiction than fact) which was fictionalized further into this movie. So, what we get is a plot that probably contains small pieces of a real story that has already been exaggerated. Basically, ask any college-aged dude for a story from his weekend and you'll get the same accuracy.

I don't feel like hashing out the plot. Due to the drawn out beginning, I could spend an entire fucking post on the main character's back story. Suffice it to say this: young priest questions his belief in God and takes an exorcism course, witnesses exorcisms, still doesn't believe and eventually has to exorcize his mentor. Oh, but guess what? If he doesn't believe, he can't defeat the demon. Ouu, got me there! I never saw that one coming.

"But Dan, there must be something good about it, Hollywood wouldn't do that to me!" You sound like a forgiving victim of spousal abuse. Yes, Hollywood will do that to you and they did it right here.

Hopkins is great as usual. Even when he's cashing a check to remodel his flat in England or whereever, he still rocks it. Too bad he's absent for 40 minutes and then has to drag his acting chops through absolute dreck for the rest of the movie. His best moment by far is when he slaps a young girl because, honestly, how often will you get to see a demonic Anthony Hopkins slap a child?

Overall, a complete misfire and missed opportunity to do some real scary stuff. Let's see more body contortions, more blood an a lot more vulgarity. Basically, let's see this movie be more like my first sexual encounter.